Story of a man first love

  • t0myknight

    khoảng 1 10 năm trước
  • What is fate? Do I believe in fate or not? I guess, yes. When I first met her, fate has decided that we couldn't be together. And I knew that from the beginning.
    What was the first image of her that captured my heart? Hmm... Yes... It was her eyes. Her eyes, with the color of ocean blue, have captured my heart from the first time. Next, her smile. So lovely. Whenever I visual her smile in my mind, I fall in love with her all over again. I guess you could say that I have fallen for her more than hundredths of times. But I don't think there is any guy in this world that could resist her smile. I know I can't resist her smile.
    It was sad. I complained to god all the time why couldn't she move to my life faster? Or earlier? I guess fate has decided. Yes. It’s all fate's fault. But I'm glad fate didn't delay our encounter.
    In my sophomore year in high school, I met her in my new school. Before, I complained to my parents why we have to move. But afterward, I'm glad we did move or else I wouldn't meet her.
    Shy. My shyness. I was scare. I am a silent type of guy. I wish I could be more out going, but I guess I’m not. It took me a while to get to know her, to know her inner beauty, to go crazy about her, and to love her both outside and inside. I became her best friend. And I’m glad that I did everything to get close to her.
    Every afternoon under the cold of November, I walked her home almost everyday. We laughed, smiled, and enjoyed our life. She made me laugh all the time because of her jokes. We were making poems out of nowhere. "The leaf is green. The sky is blue. Down on our path, I’m walking next to you". We talked about school, life, and coffee. Yes... She loves Starbuck coffee. I remember I told her that coffee isn't good for you. After that, she just stared at me and smiled. Smile. Damn her smile keep floating in my mind even today. Also her beauty haunting me even today. The wind flowed and red, yellow, orange leafs were fallen. Just like a goddess, the wind and the leaves followed her path just to gaze at her beauty for a glace then lost under the power of nature. I, too, lost in her beauty.
    The time went by so fast. November ended and delivered December with white beauties all over the land. Cold, but still, my devotion for her continued on with many beautiful memories that she and I left on our track. Snowball. It’s a game we both love to play. Every now and then, whenever we have time while walking home, she started a snow fight. I could never forget that moment. She hit me with a snowball just like how she hit my heart. One shot with 100% accuracy. I turned around and started to fight back. She ran. So cute. For the first time I think it’s cute the way she was running. I chased after her but I didn't want to catch her. I wanted that moment to last forever. The moment with laughers, joys, and the mix feelings of cold and hot.
    Everything has to come to an end eventually. Our snow fight ended when she tired out and couldn't run anymore. She was shivering. Cold. I held to her hands. Cold as ice. I wished there is someway to make her feel better. Anyway will do. I took her hands and let her felt my face. She only looked at me and smile. Same smile that got me the first time. Under the cold of December, we walked home together under the fiery flame. And I was really happy. The happiest time of my life. I wished the time would stop and then world would just disappear but only us two left. I looked at her and I can see my whole life in the future with her.
    Time passed so fast. So fast that I didn't have enough time to realize that she is the only one that truly made me in love. I guess it’s true. First love is the only love that you actually in love. I couldn't resist any longer of loving her. I wanted to protect her as my girlfriend and I wanted to be with her forever. But life isn't that easy. Fate, fate shattered my whole imagination, my whole dreams that someday she will be my girlfriend. She went out with a guy right before my confession. Thanks fate. You let me felt the happiness of being in love. You let me laughed with the love of my life. You let me find my perfect girl then you took her away just like that. Also thanks to you, fate, you let me experienced something that I’ve never felt before. Pain, sorrow, lost, confusion. I didn't blame her because I couldn't. I can only blame on my fate. I can only blame myself because I’m not fast enough. I say to myself. A crush is nothing. No. It’s more than a crush. It’s my first love and my only love. My lost love.
    Late. I was happy to be her best friend but I did still keep on loving her as her secret lover. My love for her couldn't be express so I locked my feelings inside. Time continued to pass and my love continued to lock inside until summer came.

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